Friday, September 23, 2005

I Am That Girl

Update: Since I changed my commenting system to Haloscan, all the previous comments were lost. So sorry! At least now I’m trackback enabled. *sheepish grin*

Note: Usually I am not such a trend-whore, but something as meaningful as this could not be passed up. For those not in the know, this is in response to a meme started by MercerMachine, titled “I’m that guy”. Tomorrow has an extensive trackback list of all the people who participated.

I Am That Girl

I’m that girl. Yes, that girl, whom at 8, felt older than the rest of the world. I’m that girl who climbed trees and played soccer and cricket with the boys, yet loved her Barbie Dolls. I’m that girl who was always on the outside, no matter where she went.

I’m that girl who is always so resistant to change, yet when it actually happens, she adapts like a chameleon. I’m that girl who played alone in the playground of her new flat, because she didn’t know anyone in this new country. I’m that girl who made a hobby of going up and down in the elevators of HDB blocks, because it was all so new to her.

I’m that girl who then grew up and fell in love with you. I was the one who would make all kinds of excuses to be with you, even though she didn’t know why. I’m that girl who thought you were beautiful even when you were drenched, exhausted, and had a pimple on your nose.

I’m that girl, who told you her love by the seaside, waves lapping up on the shore of Sentosa, knowing you could never reciprocate. I was the girl who then watched you walk away from me, after you most politely rejected me because…. I was a girl.

I’m that girl, who said no because she didn’t want to break your heart with the pain of distance. I’m that girl who still loves you from afar.

I’m the girl who cried for you when you told me about what your father was doing to you. I’m that girl who cut herself, in order to feel the pain that her own words caused you.

I’m the girl who worries about you, battling breast cancer. I’m that girl who loves you both like sisters, yet dare not say a word for the fear of being misunderstood. I’m that girl who sees you come online, but act like I haven’t, because too much has happened.

I am the girl now, who watches your every move now, every facial expression and gesture. I am the girl who flushes every single time you speak to me. I am that girl, who gets irrationally jealous when others get near you, boy or girl.

I’m that girl, who lost you when I told you I was bisexual. I’m the one, who loves men and women, but presents only one side to the world for the fear of losing more of you.

I’m that girl, who started this blog to express the other side.

Yeah, I’m that girl. So who are you?