Used Brains for Sale

Moved

2007-10-24T16:51:00.000+08:00

If you are still coming here, you are behind times! My new blog is at

http://pleinelune.wordpress.com

Update your bookmarks and RSS feeds please.

Sayoni - the beginning

2006-01-15T17:15:00.000+08:00

Yes, I know I haven't blogged in a long time. The minute I came back from India, I was swamped with work, work and more work.

After that was over, something new surfaced, that took my attention away from this blog. I became involved with a group of women from signel/redqueen, who are embarking on an ambitious project: starting a new platform for queer women. That's where all my time in the past few weeks have gone, building the blog and forum. I've been building Sayoni.

The aim? To empower queer Asian women, to keep them informed, and to facilitate discussion within the community. This kind of thing has never been done before, and we are really excited to be doing this, poised at the edge of a revolution.

Why aren't we being "activists", demanding equal rights? Because, before we can bang on the parliament doors and demand gay marriage, we have to build community spirit. The blog will be a place for us to speak our mind about issues that concern us, from different points of view. Yours truly will be talking about being a young queer girl, being bisexual, and being in a minority. Others will be talking about things like being an older lesbian lesbian, being christian etc. Something to cater to everyone. The forum is for you, to talk among yourself about whatever you want. The site is for YOU. We just run it.

Hence, to jumpstart the "beta" release of Sayoni, I'd like to appeal to all the gay readers of my blog to visit the site, read the blog and forum.

What does that mean for this blog? Well, I can't possibly juggle three blogs, this, singabloodypore and sayoni, especially with exams looming. Hence, with great regret, I am shutting this down. Hence, from now on, if you wish to read me, Sayoni is the place to go, though I'll only be talking about exclusively gay issues. Perhaps, after my exams, I'll start a personal blog again.

Until then, sayonara!

Ladies

2005-12-09T16:09:00.000+08:00

Yes siree, I am back. If I weren't wishing I had had more time with the North Indian girls, I'd say it is good to be back. [For the record, that time refers to the time I spend looking at them. What in there world were you thinking?]

Knowing my steadfast love for all ladies who are brunettes, it should come as no surprise that my jaw inevitably drops open when it comes to North Indian women. Unfortunately, I couldn't shoot even one-tenth of the number of gorgeous ladies that I laid my eyes on.

Gorgeous ladies aside, the trip was an interesting journey, to say the least. More to come in later posts.

Home

2005-11-21T22:35:00.000+08:00

The plane cruises through the clouds, defying gravity. I look through the oval windows, admiring the greenery below me, the rivers meandering through the landscape. I guess we are passing over Andra Pradesh or something, for Northern India is not as green. Soon enough, the greenery disappears, to be replaced by a brownish landscape. The land is chequered, divided into so many neat squares by a giant hand, a huge chessboard.

The plane curves and makes a smooth landing. The cool voice of the air hostess tells me that is the 29 degrees maxmum, dipping as low as 14 degrees: radically different from Singapore.

It is not until that I am in the car, reclining against the plush chair enjoying the aircon, and a small girl runs upto our vehicle desperately pressing today's paper against the glass, begging us to buy one, that it truly hits me: I am in India.

Break

2005-11-17T10:19:00.000+08:00

By this time tomorrow, I'll be reclining comfortably on a plush chair, accepting hot towels and drinks from a smiling air hostess. And it will take another three weeks or so for me to do the same thing on the way back.

That's right, I am going to India for three weeks. As happy as that news is, it also means I have to abandon this blog for a short while. I'll try my best to get on a computer during the trip and blog (I am sure I'll have lots of things to blog about), but it is doubtful.

Meanwhile, don't go away! Subscribe to my feed so as to get RSS updates, or use the email update function (look to my sidebar) so that you won't miss anything.

Ciao.

The most accurate online test I've ever taken

2005-11-17T10:02:00.000+08:00

You Are Artemis!

Brave, and a natural born leader.
You're willing to fight for what you believe in...
And willing to make tough decisions.
Don't forget - the people around you have ideas too!

What Goddess Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Goddess

2005-11-11T20:56:00.000+08:00

This announcement probably a year behind time, dissonant after the revolution has already swept past. But that has always been the case with me: it took me two years to latch on to the Harry Potter craze. And now, I've just discovered the craze that is Dan Brown. More accurately, that of the Da Vinci Code.

Reading through it is like flipping through several history books whose interesting bits have been cut out and pasted upon a colourful story board. The facts may not always be accurate, and the story implausible at some points. But the storyteller that is Dan Brown, weaves a wonderfully complex world for us to immerse ourselves in, ignoring whatever historical inconsistencies there might be. I do not think that most of it is that untrue, though, as he is merely echoing the theories of many a historian investigating the myth of the Holy Grail.

The symbology, the culture, and rites of various religions nterest me greatly, despite, maybe even because I've rejected organised religion. I can examine rituals and concepts with a dispassionate, unbiased mind, not limited by notions of apostacy or heresy, the more pagan the better.

What really interested me about the Da Vinci Code is the reference to the sacred feminine. Practically every ancient culture once has had Goddess Worship as a part of it. Reverence for the sacred feminine, the giver of life and love has been an integral part of many a culture. You would remember my post on Sayoni, and the obvious lesbian aspect of the ancient myth. But that is just a tip of the iceberg of Goddess Worship that is apparent in Hinduism.

In contrast, the intense mysogyny in many parts of the world has been perpetrated by male chauvinist religious leaders bent on keeping the grip of power within male hands, suppressing the previous reverence for the sacred feminine, deeming it pagan. The tide may have changed with the advent of female liberation, but not enough. It is a man's world.

I've questioned many times: why must God be characterised a man? In fact, if a God exists, and if endowed with a gender, She should be a woman, as she is the creator of all life. Furthermore is the possiblity that God is in equal parts male and female. [I can already hear the howls of outrage now]

To touch a woman, according her the appropriate respect and reverence, not seeing her an object of sex, is to touch a living Goddess. I feel doubly blessed to be a queer woman, for being a woman, and being able to appreciate and love other women. Take a snapshot of this, because this is the most spiritual statement you'll ever hear from me. *click*

technorati tags: women, Da Vinci Code, mythology, sacred feminine

Nope, we are not homophobic

2005-11-10T00:01:00.000+08:00

I just received this today on the signel mailing list. Needless to say, I am utterly and totally convinced that I should leave this country at the first opportunity.

The National Arts Council (NAC) has changed its mind and has flatly told PLU3 that the open meeting scheduled for Thursday 11 Nov at the National Library cannot be permitted.

Over the last week or so, they had been expressing "concerns", which were never clearly specified, but which left us absolutely no doubt that they simply centred around the fact that we are gay.

A mid level officer who had originally told us our meeting was OK, after we gave her a few assurances as to the nature of the meeting, later told me that she expected to be overruled by "senior management". Other sources indicated that the instruction to scuttle the event came from the MICA Minister himself.

What happened was that after I made the first posting on SiGNeL, a copy of it was sent to NAC or MICA. Immediately the midlevel officer was told of the management's "grave concern". She read that as a hint that she was expected to withdraw her decision. I spoke to her on the phone, clarified a few more things, and the conversation ended with her saying she'd re-consult her higher management.

For that reason, I did not wish to reply to Roy's email on the subject; the matter being in flux.

A few days later, I heard that NAC had definitely reversed its decision.

This indicates to me two possible explanations.

First, that the mid-level officers had a different outlook from the "senior management" (which could be just one top honcho). One level was prepared to approve, the other not, but didn't become aware of the mid level's decision until later. Clearly, the mid-level, embarrassed and censured over this incident, will no longer want to exercise any initative in the future, and thus our civil service has died a little bit more.

Second possibility: the senior management were/was aware from the start, but preferred the hypocrisy of silence and shadows. The moment it became public, they had to cover their asses. This tells us something about our senior civil service or political levels that boast of honesty and integrity in speech and action.

I don't have to mention how absurd this is considering PM Lee's "the government is not homophobic" claim.

If anyone had posted the original message to other lists/boards, please do likewise with this one, otherwise, people may go to the National Library for nothing.

I've nothing to say for this news. We take a tentative step forward, and then someone pushes us two steps backwards. Someone speculated that there is a "spy" inside Signel who rang the alarm bells when the details of the meeting were made public. But you know what, I don't care. I am tired of fighting against this. I am tired, of being gay, just like Popagandhi. I have no girlfriend whose hand I am afraid to hold. But it is tiring, to play peek-a-boo with everyone around you. It is tiring to keep your chin up when all that the ones in power want to do is beat you down.

Think about this: how would we react, if this was a meeting for some racial group? SINDA, perhaps? MENDAKI? I pity those who can't see the link between racial discrimination and homophobia, how they can accept those of a different colour, but can't accept those who love differently.

Again and again, I hear the phrase "Singaporeans are conservative". Who determined that? Did someone go around asking every Singaporean how they felt? Was any effort made to educate people about homosexuality? And yet, our PM has the cheek to say that the gahmen is not homophobic. And you know something? Almost the exact same words were repeated during the suffrage movement and during the civil rights movement. In the 1950s, people in America thought that inter-racial marriage was IMMORAL. Somehow, I am hearing those words again, but this time, with the three-letter word instead.

History repeats itself, but who cares?

Links:
Singabloodypore - PLU banned from NLB

technorati tags: gay, rights, singapore

Tomb Raider

2005-11-06T19:00:00.000+08:00

It is high time I admitted it to the world: I am a Tomb Raider fan. I am one of those who spend hours in front of the computer making Lara swing, climb and shoot. I LOVE Tomb Raider 6, and have played through it three times.

I am one of those who drools over Angelina Jolie in her Lara Croft outfit, not caring she was wearing padding. I mean, who wants to know details like that when such eye candy presents itself?

Now Eidos Studios has done something to make sure I'll buy Tomb Raider 7: they based Lara on this hottie below: Rhona Mitra. Half Indian, half british.... in other words... ooh lala!

Three words: marry me Rhona!

technorati tags: tomb raider, rhona mitra

This Week in Lesbian Entertainment

2005-11-05T18:57:00.000+08:00

At precisely 3.30 pm on a Saturday, my jaw drops open as a lesbian music video plays on the huge screen outside Orchard Emerald. Wait a minute.. this is Singapore, otherwise known as the country which can easily be renamed Straightapore. Where the sun is always shining, and the gahmen is not homophobic. Umhmm.

I glance at the title of the video, and my heart sinks. Get ready for the bad news....

TATU is back, to the consternation of both lesbian women and straight-lace conservatives. That's right, boys, better start placing orders for their latest ~~het male fantasy~~ hot CD.

But what's so bad about Tatu? They are lesbians, right? We should be grateful for such visibility, right?

Wrong. We are as grateful to them as we are to the scores of women in lesbian porn made for straight men. Making-out sessions in school-girl outfits which are highly reminiscent of Britney's lolitaesque first music video do not constitute as lesbian visibility.

On the bright side, "Saving Face" is now playing in theatres. My only grouse about the movie is that it shows a rather andro-femme lesbian pairing, but even that is forgivable with its happy ending.

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I know this movie is old news and not exactly this week, but I want to watch "The Journey"! It is extremely unlikely to show here unless in a film fest. Can you believe I've yet to watch "Fire", but I've watched and rewatched every single episode of The L Word? Talk about irony...

technorati tags: lesbian, entertainment, TATU, saving face

PLU Open Meeting

2005-11-03T11:51:00.000+08:00

I received this email from the signel and redqueen mailing list, and thought to share it with my readers who may not be in there. Please do attend this meeting if you can. Yours truly will try her best to be there, but given that I've to keep as anonymous as possible, it is questionable.

PLU Open Committee Meeting on the 10th Nov

The title begs more questions than it answers, and that's deliberate.

There will be a week of activities at the National Library and Drama
Centre leading up to its official opening on 12 Nov. Most of the
activities are in the form of interactive theatre.

On most evenings, the big room on the 5th floor will host a committee
meeting of some NGO or other. Normally such meetings are closed-door,
but for the purposes of challenging the public's minds, they will be
open to the public, Whether the public can participate, or only observe
is left to each NGO to decide.

People Like Us has been allocated the evening of Thursday 10 Nov, time
slot 7.00 - 8.30 pm. So we're going to hold a meeting there where the
public can see real lesbian and gay people (who don't look anything
like the Fridae crowd, haha) talk about gay stuff.

The public are of course free to wander in and listen. We're even going
to allow members of the public to speak and offer their views. However,
we will set one condition. If anyone wants to speak, he must take on
the persona of a gay or lesbian person and speak from that perspective.

(I wonder how many straights are going to take up this challenge)

The event is sponsored by the National Arts Council, who have with some
difficulty swallowed hard and agreed to having People Like Us on the
program. Printed leaflets too. Slowly, slowly, we're becoming
mainstream.

This will be an eye-opening experience to you, especially if you are straight. Please do attend.

Technorati Tags: PLU, gay, lesbian, singapore

Eves

2005-11-01T21:37:00.000+08:00
Note: Happy Diwali to all Hindus

Swinging my bag, I hurriedly grab the nearest available seat on the train, not noticing it is right next to a Indian foreign worker, and opposite two of them. Only after I sit down I realize my mistake, but it is too late. It doesn’t help that I am wearing what is considered one of my more “revealing” tops (ie bustline is 2 cm lower than usual). I stare at the floor, I stare at the MRT line-map, at the advertisements, anywhere, but at the guy who is staring at me now.

It is a familiar situation, this, one which I am acquainted to since I started “developing”. This ubiquitous stare follows me as I walk next to construction sites, through the streets of Little India and around the temple. I am used to the cat-calls and derogatory remarks. I am effectively blind, deaf and mute when such episodes strike, as the upbringing of most Indian women dictate. My mother often scolds me if I am wearing tight/revealing clothing when visiting Little India, clothes which would otherwise have passed the test if I were visiting Orchard Road.

(Straight) Young Indian men usually consider it their birthright to stare at other Indian women, the younger the better. While most Singaporean Indian men are fairly decent, the ones born and bred in India are usually not. India has a problem that I’ve never heard of in other countries, so much so that they’ve coined a word for it themselves: eve-teasing. Ladies, going back and forth about their business daily, are stared at, teased and molested by young hot-blooded men, often on crowded trains and buses. There is a whole faction of female policemen trained in combating this problem.

It is a defect, I believe, owing to the patriarchal structure of the Indian family, and
the absolute-chastity-before-marriage condition [making the forbidden fruit all the much sweeter]The woman is a piece of property to be passed from family to family, thus granting her scant respect. One would note that there is a direct correlation between the level of freedom and respect granted to women, and men’s behaviour towards women. It also comes back to the mother then, to ingrain in her son the proper respect towards women. But how can she, when she does not have respect for herself? Maybe this is not confined to India, but a characteristic of men and women from third-world countries, which would make a lot of sense.

And it is really not as if yours truly doesn’t enjoy looking at women, so to an extent, I know where this guy is coming from. But as hot as the girl is, I accord her the respect she deserves, and I don’t stare at her like a piece of meat, which is not what any self-respecting woman wants.

Technorati Tags : indian, india, eve-teasing, women

Srimming Sarons

2005-10-30T12:03:00.000+08:00
This post will effectively eliminate all chances that in the future, if I become a famous blogger, Expressions is going to give me an endorsement deal.

So how? I no Olinda Cho, leh. I can't sing as well as her [but that didn't stop Sly from getting into top two], and I no butch, to be feminised. I also no Irene Ang. So nevermind, lor. No free lunches, or lack thereof, to look like Sammy Cheng.

So how? Must pay money? No need, I can just turn into an anorexic like these girls. Free slimming solution! Saves daily expenditure on food! * Sign up now with a friend, and you'll receive a voucher for a C class bed in NUH!

*Terms and conditions apply. Side-effects include fainting, hypoglycaemia, poor skin, and many other problems which will not be mentioned in this advertisement.

When I open the ST, what jumps out at me, almost immediately, are the various ads from Expressions. Marie France, Jean Yip and god-knows-what-else, promising instant weight loss. On TV, stick-thin Fann Wong promises by Xando, saying she lost 2% fat after using it. [Er... what is her fat percentage now? -10%?]

And people wonder why teenage girls turn anorexic.

[What I totally don't get, is how Chinese girls, generally pencil-thin, think they are fat. Do they all use curved mirrors?]

In many countries, advertisement for cigarettes are banned, on the premise that it promotes smoking among the youth. You know what should be banned in Singapore? Advertisements for slimming services. And oh, bust-enhancement services too. Big enough alreadi, lah.

Technorati Tags : slimming, anorexia

I am that...

2005-10-26T23:47:00.000+08:00
I am reposting this on the request of the author immoralfear. Really touched my heart.

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
immoralfear: the keyboard activist speaks
Truly, one of the best pro-gay entries I've seen ~~from a straight woman~~. I could hug her if I knew where she was, for standing upto society for us. You totally rock, girl!

17-year-old blogger pleads guilty to two charges under Sedition Act

2005-10-26T23:35:00.000+08:00

SINGAPORE : 17-year-old private school student Gan Huai Shi has pleaded guilty to two charges of making seditious and inflammatory remarks about Muslims on the Internet.His lawyer hopes the remaining five similar charges can be taken into consideration so he can get a probation sentence instead of a jail term.Gan is the third person charged under the Sedition Act recently for making racist remarks in his blog.He made inflammatory comments about Malays and Muslims. He also called himself an "extreme racist."The defence lawyer said the main reason why Gan had such feelings of ill will towards the Malay community is because of the death of his younger brother when he was only seven years old.His month-old brother had breathing difficulties and needed to be taken to the hospital in a cab, but a Malay couple refused to let them go first despite his mother's pleas.By the time the family got to the hospital, his brother was already dead. His mother was subsequently diagnosed with post-natal depression.Gan's lawyer said as a result of the incident, he became an introvert, spending most of his time on the computer.Gan's teachers and Malay friends wrote in their testimonials he had never shown any racist tendencies toward them.One Malay friend, Ismail Kassim who Gan got to know during his part-time work, said he got along well with Gan and often discussed football together.Defence lawyer Edmond A. Pereira said: "They have all described him as a very quiet person, so none of them knew about his deep sentiments."But in front of the computer, he's a different animal. He is extremely remorseful for what he has done and wishes to say sorry to all Singaporeans."Gan is currently sitting for his 'O' levels which ends on November 22. His case will be heard again the day after that.
Channelnewsasia.com

Technorati Tags: sedition, singapore, blogger, racism

Flock This!

2005-10-22T21:47:00.000+08:00

When I saw Popagandhi: The Future Has Landed post, I dismissed her excitement as byproduct of her tech-loving (aka geeky) nature. Only when I downloaded Flock and tried it out for myself I realised how great Flock was.
If nothing else, it is a great blogging tool, as it allows you to blog webpages and pictures in an instant, without all that hassle of copying and pasting and switching in between windows, and that is perfect for me, as I write for Singabloodypore which requires a lot of such tedious work. [I even tried to write an applescript fort it, but failed miserably.] And, it allows you to add multiple blog accounts, which is also cool for me, as I have two, and one more in the works.

It even integrates with Flickr and delicious. How much more cool can it get?
This winter, it is time to Flock!
Technorati Tags: Flock

Sayoni

2005-10-22T20:05:00.000+08:00

No, it is not a Japanese delicacy. Neither it is a Malay endearment.
It is in fact, a mythological concept in Indian mythology. "Yoni" is sanskrit for vagina [though it has a much deeper meaning] and "sa", I would guess, is the prefix to indicate the joining, or the parallel existence of two yonis. It is pronounced not with a "nni" sound, but a light "ni", much like how you would say "ni" in chinese.

Of course, anyone can guess the meaning of this imagery - two women having sexual intercourse. In fact, in the ancient times, lesbianism WAS accepted in India, and many temples were carved with erotic images of lesbians. That was of course, before Mahatma Gandhi led his people to destroy most of those carvings and paintings.

As I explored the Yoniversum, it became increasingly clear how much the ancient Indians respected and revered the female organ. Yoni Tantra, in essence ritualised cunninglitus, takes this worship to another level. What's amazing is that there is no restriction on who can perform this, ie, same-sex intercourse is permitted.

So we have to ask, for a civilisation that once had a rich homoerotic culture, why are lesbians prosecuted by cutting off fingers and with public humiliation? The answer can be found in one word: colonisation. The British who occupied India brought with them prudish, Victorian values inculcated by the Church, and spread the homophobia to the local population. The same goes for all the Asian countries, except Thailand, which was never colonised. These countries are now protesting homosexuality over "Asian" values, and adopting decadent "Western culture", while UK itself is one of the more gay-friendly countries now. Ah, precious irony.

Upon further reading, the site tells me that worshipping a woman's yoni is the ultimate worship. Okay. Uhum. Sure. No problem at all, with that. Nope. I shall be a most devout worshipper. For once, my former religion has said something completely sensible. If anyone asks, I am just being a faithful follower, oh-kay? Okay.

All images and animations are copyright of Yoniversum, I just borrowed it for demonstration purposes.

Technorati Tags : yoni, lesbian, india, mythology

The Joy of Ads

2005-10-22T00:56:00.000+08:00
Advertising, the dirty A word, is usually agreed to be the most evil thing invented by consumerism. It springs at you from billboards on the expressway, and from the TV, often at the critical moment of the hero's adventure as he hangs off a cliff. But without advertising, you wouldn't be reading this blog, because guess what makes blogspot free? It is the singular entity driving most of the businesses in the world, from the repetitive, nasal cries of the market fisherman, to the flashy icons of Microsoft.

Over the years, advertising media has matured and become more sophisticated, as the market does the same. New ideas have to be thought of to catch the consumer's attention, from the thousand other ads that surround him. As a person who appreciates film, I always appreciate good creative ads. But what makes a good ad?

From now on, let it be known that jingles are EVIL. Evil right down to their hyperactive lyrics that stick in your head, and give you a headache everytime you hear it. I hate any ad with a jingle, and make maximum effort not to buy that product. I refuse to fall for repetitive-song-induced hypnotism. Nope. No siree. Never. *worriedly searches her room for such products*

One of the worst ads I've seen is where, typically, a woman hyperactively waxes lyrical about the product, usually dishwasher liquid. She oohs, aahs, and swears by the product for her successful home life.

Recently, the ad that has invaded our everyday space is the NTUC Income ad about insurance, playing on most MRTs. I literally winced when I watched it, wondering if the writers had just come out of a 20-year confinement and had lost all creativity. The actors looked like they had just gotten a botox shot and couldn't move a muscle.

Then of course, there is the infamous Richard Gere ad, waving his Visa card in India. Apart from the cultural depiction which I shall not comment on, it is utterly nonsensical. Show a bird seller in India a Visa card, and he'll ask you whether it is a new type of food for birds. He certainly wouldn't sell a thousand birds to you in an instant so that you can play the hero with a little girl. The only saving grace? Richard Gere's oozing sex appeal and effortless goofiness, and the oh-so-cute little girl.

Ironically, one of the best ads I've seen are from India, considering I grew up watching the dishwashing-liquid ads which used to be rampant there. This Airtel advertisement is seen on Asianet, the Malayalee channel.

You hear an Airtel ringtone playing somewhere, but you don't see where it comes from. A well-dressed, rich young man exits from his sports car and checks his handphone. It is not from his handphone. A auto-rickshaw driver is boasting to his friends about a rich tourist, and he whips out his handphone to check. It it not his handphone either. Cut to a rickshaw driver pedalling his livelihood, and he takes out the phone to answer. "New customer? At the Hotel? Foreigner, ah? I'll be there immediately!" Cut to the amazed expressions on the autorickshaw drivers' faces.

It is a simple, but powerful advertisement. Message? Our prices are so low, even a rickshaw driver can afford one. And what I like most about this ad is that it is reflective of a social trend in India, where handphones are catching on so fast the companies can't keep up. [Mainly due to the fact that most houses don't have a landline installed, either due to infrastructure or affordability problems. Infrastructure, most of the time, due to the inefficient Indian government]

One can debate the evils of advertisements, how it is driving the young to buy things they don't need, how it drives up anorexia and other problems. But it is useless to deny the existence of an artform that has evolved from this necessary evil.

Technorati Tags : india, advertising

Faith

2005-10-16T22:17:00.000+08:00
I've been talking to this woman, who is going through "the phase". And it is really hard for her, because she is Christian. Try as I might, I can't make her see sense.

Now, everyone who knows me knows that I have nothing but contempt for the institution of religion. I've seen that no religion in our world is the path to "God". And I am sick of what it is doing to our world, and what people are doing, in the name of it. I am not just talking about the terrorist attacks by radical muslim groups: I am talking about how women in Middle East are oppressed using religion, how basic civil rights are withheld from people when some religious conservatives wave around a bible. I am talking about how a pastor proclaimed that Mathew Shepard, the famous victim of a gay-bashing, deserved to die. I am talking about how two religions, both from the same root, are killing each other over a tiny strip of land.

I am talking, about the millions of people whose lives have been torn apart due to this myth. And the millions more who will be affected if we let this continue.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Religion is between you and Him. There is no need to involve a third party, countless rituals and rules for that communion to happen.

Religiousity does not necessarily indicate a person of good character. There are devout Christian folks who regularly abuse their children, sometimes sexually. The terrorists blowing themselves up everyday are really devout Muslims, but can anyone say they are good people? Brainwashing aside, it takes a really cold-blooded person to walk through a market and press the remote in selfish hopes of getting to Heaven.

*******

Closer to home, I am rather disgusted by the way some people evangelise shamelessly. Yes, granted, it is a part of Christianity to spread the faith - but that, in the context of our society, is absolutely tasteless. Having encountered many a Christian who wanted to save me from the depths of Hell, I've learned the correct way to deal with them: smile, nod, take the leaflet and throw it into the dustbin. If they persist, tell them you have a dentist appointment.

It is insensitive, and very offensive to be told that you are going to Hell unless you abandon your faith and join Christianity. I've talked to several muslim friends of mine who've been, very stupidly, approached by these well-meaning people, and yes, they ARE offended.

At the same time, if a Muslim were to do this, he'd be marked as a terrorist. Ah, the joys of being a minority.

Most of all, I think it is entirely inappropriate for a teacher to be "spreading the word". It is simply not ethical. The students, more often than not, are doing it to stay on the good side of the teachers. Afraid of getting low marks in the next test, you see.

Just be contented in your faith, and don't impose it on others. That's all I can ask of you.

Note: I don't have anything against Christians, mind you. This is just what I think about them evangelising without thought to the religious diversity of our country. Don't go and sedition act me, hor?

Confessions of a Switcher

2005-10-12T20:56:00.000+08:00
Dear Steve,

It dearly pains me to write this. I could lie and say our parting was unintended, but now, I have to confess. I was in love with another long before this letter had to be written. I could also lie and say that it is not you, but me. You know me, I cannot lie.

Our seven-year relationship has seen its ups and downs. When I first saw you, you took my heart by offering me games. I knew, even then, that ours was going to be a beautiful relationship. I could not be parted from you, even though my parents deeply disapproved of our relationship. They said it was bad for my studies, that I spent too much time with you. There were times they banned me from being with you at all. But still, I sneaked off to be with you, almost every night.

What really sealed my love for you, was you undergoing a makeover, and emerging as XP, a feast for the eyes. I couldn’t recognize you, if it wasn’t for the familiar logo.

But trouble soon crept into our relationship. After getting the makeover, you became high-maintenance, moody and irritable. Often, you would crash and leave me in the lurch. You would just get up and leave in the middle of a date, often wasting all my hard work. At those times, need forced me to be with others like you. But I knew those flings wouldn’t last - true enough, when you came back to me, our love only deepened.

But now, I’ve found another. Another Steve, coincidentally. I had met him before, and he struck me as very unfriendly. He couldn’t treat a woman right. But after several hostile brushoffs, I came to see his good side. It really helped he was learning more social skills, reaching out to more people. After deep, soul-baring conversations with a friend, I came to realize I was falling in love with another!

I resisted it at first, but soon, it was painfully clear our relationship had come to a standstill. Old age was taking over you, and you had become rather portly. Him, on the other hand, was fit, toned and slim. I realized I had lost all attraction to you. His equipment, an impressive 12”, never fails to satisfy me. Best of all, he never has performance anxiety. As soon as I turn him on, he is good to go. You, on the other hand… I’ll just leave it at that.

So, that’s why, yesterday, I packed up all my stuff and moved in with him. It took me some time to learn his ways, but as soon as I did, I’ve realized this is the best thing for me. Every time I am with him, I discover something new about him.

I am sorry this had to end up this way. Perhaps we’ll meet again one day, and we can be friends. But nothing more.

Best wishes,

A Switcher

Shameless RSS Evangelist

2005-10-10T16:43:00.000+08:00
Since the "Shameless Mac Evangelist" title rightfully belongs to some other bloggers around here, I've decided to take on the title of the "Shameless RSS Evangelist". And like a new convert who is even more fervent than the ones who are born into the religion, I shall preach to you all about the greatness of RSS. So... *adjusts the dolby surround system to get a deep bass voice*

Media Think says "RSS presents a huge opportunity to create communication efficiencies inside the enterprise." These are words we must take to heart, my little lost lambs. Without RSS, you'll be lost. Without RSS, you'll be wandering the internet in search of information you need, turning here and there, going to evil websites which require Satanic inventions such as credit cards. Without RSS, you'll have to click on your bookmarks daily to read your favourite blogs.

I was once lost, now I am saved. Deliverance came to me in the form of Newsgator. When I submitted my first feed, I knew I was doing the right thing. But subscribing to every blog that had a RSS feed wasn't enough. I had to spread the word, show the light. Soon, I was requesting every blogger to come over to the right side, to offer their blogs to the Feedburner.

But alas, not every blogger could see the light. They laughed at me, mocked at me for putting my faith in something so techy. They refused to add the orange buttons of salvation to their blogs, so I was forced to make daily trips to their blogs.

But to my horror, I discovered that Microsoft had joined the cult, but they wanted to alter the very symbols of our faith! What sacrilege! The faithful responded immediately, telling Microsoft not to alter the icons, but sadly, it seems they are drifting away from the Church of RSS, and no one can stop them. May the RSS gods have mercy on their soul.

Now, my little lambs, I want you all to go back home and think about this. If you truly desire salvation, then put the holy symbol of our faith on your blogs and webpages. If not... prepare to be left behind in webhell.

[/sermon]

Or, just go to Feedburner.com, and burn your blog right now. As a newsreader, I'd recommend Newsgator or My Yahoo! If you prefer desktop versions, Feeddemon is good. If you wish to search the web daily for articles of a specific topic, moreover.com is a good choice, instead of wading through pages of Google searches daily. You can use it to add the feeds you want to your newsreader, for example, articles all over the web pertaining to Singapore. Happy burning!

Gahmen Says No. As usual

2005-10-08T10:13:00.000+08:00
It is being discussed in every Singaporean gay forum, website and blogs, and probably other places I haven’t heard of: the LHL has proclaimed publicly that gay parades will not be allowed perhaps in the next 20 years.

Of course, LHL, gay people are like “you and me”. So why in the world are we still criminalised for loving our partners? This law is at its best, antiquated. Even the source of that law, the British Penal Code, has been revised in its homeland. So why are you still holding on to that outmoded law, which prevents even straight people from having anything other than vaginal intercourse? Perhaps the government is conspiring to increase the birth rate by outlawing anything other than procreative sex. Blowjobs don’t get anyone pregnant, you see.

If you are going to tell me that majority of Singaporeans are conservative, blah blah blah, tell me what YOU have done to rectify that. The MOE syllabus remains staunchly homophobic, so is it any wonder students grow up that way? Let me put this question to the gahmen: if the situation was such that a majority race didn’t approve of a minority race, and thought that allowing them to get married was wrong, would you still hold on to this policy? Singapore, after all, prides itself as a multi-racial nation – and such a state requires that the needs of the minority be met too. True enough, the minority races are allowed their own spaces, festivals etc, even if the majority may not like it, or disapprove of it. The Christians and Muslims think each other as infidels – but are we marginalising the Muslims because the Christians are the majority compared to them? Are we stopping Muslims from celebrating Ramadan, though the Christians think it is pagan? So why this double standard concerning gay people, when everyday, we are told in school to be tolerant of diversity? How do we, in any way, intrude upon the rights of straight people?

What really bothers me about LHL’s line of argument is how another issue polarised the nation the same way, but the government went ahead and legalised it anyway. Yes, I AM talking about the casino issue. Polls show that majority of Singaporeans were against it, if by a small margin, who were concerned about the moral degradation such an installation would bring. But once again, the gahmen demonstrated its extraordinary ability to twist issues the way they wanted, and assured the public that would not be the case. So, LHL, legalising gay sex acts/marriage would lead to moral degradation, and casinos wouldn’t. Yeah, okay. But what does that matter, when casinos can bring in billions of dollars in revenue, and gay people wouldn’t?

I rest my case.

Links:
PLU3's rebuttal
Singabloodypore
Straits Times article... wait, STI requires subscription. Sorry ah. No link, can?

Singapore, gay rights, casino

The Geek Shall Inherit the Earth

2005-10-05T18:46:00.000+08:00
In the spirit of the hated exam season, I’ve set myself a mini GP question and answered it. Maybe this GP teacher can be kind enough to grade it for me.

Question: The bloggosphere is a technocracy. Discuss.

To blog or to not blog, that is the question. Well, not really, as everyone from the unhappy Microsoft employee to the average teenager now has a weblog. The blogging world is as diverse as the natural fauna and fauna and flora of the earth, perhaps more. You have the ultra-serious bloggers who discuss politics and philosophy, and the angsty teens who whine and moan about their horrible life when their iPod’s battery dies.

From this author’s observation, the bloggers who make it big have similar qualities, such as being funny, satirical or deeply insightful about certain societal issues. In fact, humour seems to be a major factor in attracting visitors to a site, which explains why a no-brainer, grammar-butchering, M-18(for language) blog such as Rockson’s is so popular. [Clearly, Singaporeans have a rather unrefined idea of what humour is]

A classic case study, of course, is everyone’s favourite Popagandhi, the ardent mac-lover and alpha-geek. She reigns supreme in the bloggosphere with her technically superior website, and posts full of mac jargon that an omega-geek like me couldn’t possibly understand. And she, with her Reality Distortion field[commissioned by Steve Jobs himself], attracts lesbians and mac-lovers like moths to a flame [often, they are the same people] and has often managed to convert the former to the latter. One also notices that these bloggers stay up to date with the latest blogventions, such as Trackback, RSS/Atom feedburning, podcasting etc.

Viewed in this light, however, the success of Xiaxue seems puzzling. She still uses her blogspot site, has very little bells and whistles to offer, and heavens, doesn’t even have a RSS feed on her site! She is not that funny and satirical anymore either. So what gives? The answer lies in the fact that she is an absolute Photoshop genius. With such a geeky skill under her belt, is it any wonder that people(read: men) love her ~~pictures~~ blog?

Hence, I conclude that to come on top in the blogging world, it is necessary to be at the top of the technocracy hierarchy, which explains why this blog is relatively unknown, save my five paragraphs of fame.

Note: This author means no offense to the bloggers mentioned here – everything said here is utterly in jest! Don’t flame me, hor?

How, can get A1 anot? My england not that bad sia. Very powderful, right?

Blogging, Technocracy, Geeks

The Golden Ticket!

2005-10-04T17:46:00.000+08:00
I've just got a Wordpress Golden ticket! And no idea what to do with it. Logic tells me I should move my blog over to Wordpress, infinitely superior to Blogger in every way. Will meditate upon it, and reach a decision when I get my ibook.

Before you ask... yes, I've been infected with what is known as geekosis, also known as macophilia, and windophobia. Prognosis is grim, and subject is not expected to recover. Source of infection, popular blogger Popagandhi. If not contained, this outbreak is expected to spread to the general population at hand, with their weak windoze immunity.

Wordpress, Macs

My Five Paragraphs of Fame

2005-10-04T16:57:00.000+08:00
Woah. Still can't get over the fact that my blog has been featured in the ST, considering it is relatively unknown.

To think, when I was contacted by the reporter, I was worried big-time about being busted for talking about Martyn See and freedom of speech, as I thought the reporter was going to feature THAT article, not my rather light-hearted one on teachers. *grumbles about vague ST reporters* Still, have to thank her I suppose.

Now that practically half of Singapore has read it, I should be watching for teachers flaming my blog. Thank goodness they have no idea what school I am in, or I might just be the next to get suspended like these JC kids. Would be a good way to get out of doing exams, though. ;)

BBC, here I come. [Hey, I can dream, can't I?]

Straits Times

Commonplace Terror

2005-10-02T12:58:00.000+08:00
And it happens, again. Once again, brainwashed militants have killed and wounded innocents who have done absolutely nothing to them, all in the name of religion. A religion, which by right, preaches peace and tolerance.

But this is nothing, really. Daily, suicide bombs go off all over Baghdad. They have become as common as traffic accidents on a busy highway, so much so that hearing that 100 people have been killed by a suicide bomb in Balad induces no emotion, no sympathy for the lost lives.

And let me interject here, that these Islamic insurgents are killing their own Muslim brothers. Not the so-called "infidels".

I have to ask, what goes in the minds of these bombers? How do they justify to themselves that killing innocents is excusable for their "greater cause", whatever that is? Do they really think that when they go to heaven (if it exists), "God" is going to forgive them for killing his creations? It makes me wonder if they were on crack when they stepped into the marketplace with a bomb strapped to their bare skins.

What I totally don't understand, as well, is how these insurgents think the bombings will revert the country to Sunni rule. Whoever the leaders are, they've got some seriously effective Jedi-like mind control/brainwashing techniques.

Bush, just so that you know, you've got a huge problem on your hands. Maybe your darling Rice didn't tell you, or rather, you didn't listen: you had no business invading Iraq, when you were so underprepared for it.

And it is time you showed some backbone, and acknowledge that you've fed this monster, if not created it. Then go to Iraq, and clear up the huge mess you've made of OIL.

Bali Bombings, Terrorism, Iraq

God is bad for you

2005-09-30T10:27:00.000+08:00
It has officially been proven. God is bad for you.

It took them this long to realise this? I knew all organised religion was bullshit by the time I was 10 years old. Whether or not there is a God is entirely another issue, but it doesn’t take a genius to realise that organised religion brings you no closer to the truth than taking drugs does. It only creates conflict and problems of the worst nature. The world would definitely be a much better place without religion.

You don’t have to look beyond Al-Qaeda to see that.

Abolish all religions, and you will have solved three-quarter of the world’s problems. No more evangelists looking to save us from hell. No more terrorists bombing innocents in the name of Allah. No more of these “moral dilemmas”, in the name of some obscure text written thousands of years ago, which has little bearing on today’s world.

Yes, I am a freethinker, however did you guess? And it hasn’t harmed me in the least. Just because I don’t believe in the religion I was born into, doesn’t mean I’ve become a promiscuous slut, or an axe-wielding mass-murderer. Instead, the mass murderers, strangely, are the religious ones. Think John List.

It has been proven time and again that when it is a theocracy, or when the state is connected to the Church (or temple, or Mosque, or whatever), the rule borders on the tyrannical and oppressive, especially in the case of women. One look at the Middle-Eastern countries will tell you that.

The problem, I think, lies not within the religion, but the people, and how they interpret and follow the words of their founders. People being people, will interpret the words in the way that suits them the most. The writers of the books are no better: they are human too, and have their own prejudices relating to that time period.

Note: I hope this is not considered seditious or anything, because, clearly, I am not attacking a specific religion, but the very concept of organised religion, using the currently existing religions as an example to illustrate my point. I’ll say the same about any new religion that arises, or even the one I was born into.

God, Religion

Google Inc

2005-09-29T19:29:00.000+08:00
Google is looking to expand to space. Serious. Even NASA admits that Google is all-powerful. Eric Schmidt, you totally rock, you know that?

Next on Schmidt’s agenda: Heaven.

Ballmer, you’ve totally got your work cut out for you. Maybe you can take some hints from Mini Microsoft.

Scissors

2005-09-28T13:59:00.000+08:00
No one who has spent a year in Singapore needs to be told that our Gahmen is extremely fond of scissors. Censorship seems to be their favourite past-time, after having resolved the problems of providing people with basic needs such as food, shelter and education. *cut, cut, cut*

At this point, the only uncensored medium in Singapore is the bloggosphere. But even that is being encroached upon, by use of the Sedition Act, by schools punishing their students for posting comments about teachers etc.

But what ARE we coming to, when the government feels so insecure that they have to punish a film-maker for making a documentary about an opposition party member?

Yes, I am talking about the Martyn See incident. It is censorship in its most blatant form - and day by day, it scares me how much Singapore is becoming like China. One day, we'll all be required to wear red bands, bow down and sing praises of the Great Lee Hsien Loong, or his descendants.

I am not a political dissident, in any way. I really admire what Lee Kwan Yew did for Singapore, bringing a third world island to near First World status. I admire the way the economy has been maintained despite our small size. I really do wish some other countries would take a leaf from Singapore's book and learn to run as efficiently.

What I don't admire, is the one-party political arena, and the strict laws of censorship at every level of society. Granted, we are a multi-racial country, and we need to prevent racial/religious riots, as well as protect the needs of the minority. As an Indian, I recognise these laws have been made for our benefit. But this reason has been overused, in fact, abused, to curb all freedom of speech.

How absurd is a law, which prevents any sort of political films, or even a reference to the political situation of Singapore? As an amateur film-maker myself, this really gets to me. In that case, we should be prosecuting Lee Hsien Loong for speaking in front of the cameras, and the newchannels for filming it. And of course, every patriotic Singaporean who has a tape of the NDP should be fined.

I urge all of you to sign the petition for Martyn See's release, and the review of the Film Act. If we don't speak up, they'll never hear us.

EDIT: There is also a call from Amnesty International against this prosecution. Yes, it is THAT big. You can read about this in Singabloodypore

Update [29/9]: There is even an appeal by SEAPA to let Martyn See go. This gets bigger by the minute.

Human Rights, Freedom of Speech

Sorry, Ms Tan – You no spinster, oh-kay?

2005-09-27T22:12:00.000+08:00
===============================================================

Sept 27, 2005
Schools act against students for 'flaming' teachers on blogs

By Sandra Davie and Liaw Wy-Cin

FREE speech may be the buzzword on the Internet - but libel is unacceptable everywhere.The message has been sent out loud and clear, with five junior college students being punished for posting offensive remarks about two teachers and a vice-principal online.The students, all girls, were made to remove the remarks from their Internet diaries, or blogs, and suspended for three days last month. Their parents were also informed.The case is not an isolated one. Of the 31 secondary schools and junior colleges contacted, 18 said they were seeing more such incidents as the number of bloggers surges.

Seven secondary schools and two JCs have asked bloggers who criticise or insult their teachers online - 'flaming' in Internet jargon - to remove the offending remarks.

One such remark referred to a secondary school teacher as a 'prude' for disciplining a student for wearing a too-short skirt. 'Frustrated old spinster. Can't stand to see attractive girls,' the blog read.Tanglin Secondary science and PE teacher Tham Kin Loong said: 'I've had vulgarities hurled against me, my parents and my whole family in some students' blogs.'The 33-year-old added: 'Most of them do not realise the legal implications of what they are writing in such a public domain.'If teachers wish to prosecute, they may have legal grounds to do so.
Singapore Teachers' Union general secretary Swithun Lowe said the union is ready to back any teacher who wants to take legal action. It has offered legal help to a few members, but they did 'not want to affect the prospects of their young students'.Lawyers say students can be sued for defamation, even if a teacher is not named. 'As long as someone is able to identify the teacher, and it is an untrue statement that affects his reputation or livelihood, then the student is liable,' said Ms Doris Chia of Harry Elias and Partners.An injunction can be taken to get the student to remove the blog and issue an apology, she added.

But none of the schools contacted by The Straits Times has banned blogging. Rather, many English and General Paper teachers encourage it to improve students' language and writing skills.

The recent cases of two young men and a teen charged with making seditious and inflammatory remarks about Muslims on the Net have led to teachers discussing the dos and don'ts of blogging with students.

===============================================================
Three words: get over it!

As a student blogger, it completely puzzles me to see this article. Granted, there are a lot of student bloggers, and quite a number of them do have occasional references to teachers. Some of them are even quite unflattering.

So what?

What the school has to keep in mind is that such the audience of an average student blogger reaches to mostly, what… a few friends? That’s hardly cause for defamation or libel, especially considering, most of the time, the students are of one opinion about the teacher [especially if they have peculiar habits and mannerisms, or are just plain evil to the students].

Livelihood threatened? Yeah, okay. Get a grip, really. How much can the words of a 16 year old affect your career? And really, it is not as if we don’t gossip about teachers offline.

We students have no voice as it is. Any feedback we give is censored, strained, seasoned and presented on a golden platter to the authorities with all the ugly bits carved out. Blogs are our last avenue, a place for us to air what we really feel. Why are our teachers even looking at this space – don’t they have papers to mark instead of worrying what the students are saying about them?

Mr Wang has really funny response to this article (and I have to thank him, for the article, because STI requires digital subscription to access the articles *rolls eyes*)

Okay, if any teacher is going to come across this blog, let me say this to you: This probably wasn’t in the job description, but I can assure you, that being a teacher is avenue enough to invite gossip, especially if you have some weird/annoying/hilarious mannerism. When you stand in front of that classroom, that Lecture Theatre, you are putting yourself on display for the school. No way around it. It is absolutely natural that students will talk about you, we being human. Might as well accept it, and get over it.

EDIT: Mr Brown has a really good suggestion on how to deal with student bloggers.

Maybe teachers should start their own blogs and flame their students back. Better yet, have a yearly Interschool Teacher-Student Flamewar Blogging Championship. Like a WWE of blogging.

What will we see? “Samantha came to school again with an ultra-short skirt AGAIN. That girl is really getting to me!” or “Shawn forgot his homework, and was very rude to me. Boy, you better watch out that you don’t get detention from me!”

Straits Times, Teachers, Students, Blogging

Steel Safes

2005-09-26T21:24:00.000+08:00
I read the previous post, and I realised how angry, and defensive I sounded in there. But it could not be helped, considering all the things I was reading about bisexual/bicurious women, especially what the article (on Jen Sincero’s book) said about us – just passing straight women “trying it out”, or seeing it as something cool, or a tool to attract men.

Because, there is nothing cool about discrimination.

I do remember being “bicurious”, long long time ago in the distant past (okay, a year ago). What I experienced was not titillating girl-girl kisses in a nightclub, or a drunk one-night stand with a lesbian. Rather, it was intense, quiet confusion about my own identity, as I struggled with the fact that I was in fact, in love with a girl in my class. As I held her hand one day, it couldn’t be plainer that for the past two years, that was what I wanted to do, even though I denied it constantly.

Today, thanks to a few of my friends, I am very much comfortable with who I am. I love being bi, I love being me. But the problem remains that I cannot possibly “come out” in school and hope to live the semblance of a normal life, hence the steel safe (closets being too vulnerable)

Blame it on the Gahmen, who alternately turns a blind eye to all things queer, or starts accusing us of spreading AIDS. What kind of mentality does a stance like that create in its people? To this date, no one has ever explained to me exactly what family values I am destroying by loving other women. Well, if I am going to be destroying them, I should at least know what they are, right? Mr Wong? Any answer?

********

On a happy note, after I posted “I’m that girl”, someone read it, and resolved the conflict between us. Or rather, the silence, the abject lack of conversation and mutual invisibility. I am so glad that dark cloud is past. Thanks, Mercer Machine, for starting this meme!

Bisexuality, Homophobia

Bisexuality

2005-09-26T11:36:00.000+08:00
Alright – the time is ripe, it seems, to enlighten a few of you on what bisexuality really means. And yes, that goes out to all of you lesbians out there as well. The recent book by Jen Sincero throws light [in my opinion, dark] on the issue of mostly straight girls sleeping with other girls. And the occasional, hetero-male erectifying girl-girl kisses by people like Sandralicious doesn’t help. And oh, let’s not forget, bisexuality is up among young women.

Bisexuality (from Wordnet)
1: showing characteristics of both sexes [syn: androgyny, hermaphroditism]
2: sexual activity with both men and women

I am bisexual, and proud of it, as proud as any lesbian of her sexual orientation. I love women, I love men. The question about who I love more begs to be slapped. I am not a passing bicurious woman who wants to experiment doing it with those of my own gender, or worse, a straight girl who wants to get attention from men. And no, my dyke sisters, I am not a lesbian in denial.

I don’t know how or why I am bisexual. Or whether my orientation is a result of the fluid nature of female sexuality. What I do know is, I am open to settling down with a man or woman.

We bisexuals face a lot of discrimination, both from the gay and straight camps, because we don’t conform to the idea that a person can only be attracted to a person of one sex. Alvin Tan, from Fridae, has a really good write-up on bisexual bashing, which elucidates very well the problems we face. The stereotypes for us abound: the married woman with a lesbian lover on the side, whose heart she will eventually break. Or the married man with several male f*** buddies. It is not to say that such people exist. They do, unfortunately, giving the rest of the bisexual community a bad name.

Lesbian eyes always roll when a bisexual woman gets a boyfriend, and I do believe the same goes for bisexual men and his gay friends. At the same time, our straight friends believe we’ve been “straightened out”. The gross misunderstanding was highlighted clearly when my friend asked me, “How will you relate to other women when you get married [to a man]?” To me, that is as stupid as asking how a straight women would relate to other men when she gets married. If values of monogamy are to be held, then in both cases, it is up to the woman to control herself even if she attracted to someone other than her partner, no matter that person’s gender.

And I’d like, now, to officially clear the misconception that bisexuals are always in love with two people at once. If such a situation happens, it is, once again, no different from a straight woman being in love with two men at once. And no, we don’t all have threesomes – some of us actually hate it. Guys, take note: just because you have a bisexual girlfriend doesn’t mean it is license for you to have threesomes. Personally, I’d dump any boyfriend of mine who asks for a ménage-à-trois. And yes, I’ll bitch-slap any guy who assumes I’ll be amenable to one, with his girlfriend [the sole exception being that your last name is Pitt, and your girlfriend has an adopted son named Maddox]

Kinsey’s studies show that sexuality is a continnum, not a categorized shelf. You can’t just label people gay and straight, as if there was a clean line in between these two groups. The Kinsey scale says, in essence, you can regard everyone as essentially bisexual, with varying degrees of gayness and straightness. It is a spectrum, not an RGB colour divide. In the end, what does it matter whom we choose to love, as long it doesn’t harm anyone else?

Bisexuality

I Am That Girl

2005-09-23T17:47:00.000+08:00
Update: Since I changed my commenting system to Haloscan, all the previous comments were lost. So sorry! At least now I’m trackback enabled. *sheepish grin*

Note: Usually I am not such a trend-whore, but something as meaningful as this could not be passed up. For those not in the know, this is in response to a meme started by MercerMachine, titled “I’m that guy”. Tomorrow has an extensive trackback list of all the people who participated.

I Am That Girl

I’m that girl. Yes, that girl, whom at 8, felt older than the rest of the world. I’m that girl who climbed trees and played soccer and cricket with the boys, yet loved her Barbie Dolls. I’m that girl who was always on the outside, no matter where she went.

I’m that girl who is always so resistant to change, yet when it actually happens, she adapts like a chameleon. I’m that girl who played alone in the playground of her new flat, because she didn’t know anyone in this new country. I’m that girl who made a hobby of going up and down in the elevators of HDB blocks, because it was all so new to her.

I’m that girl who then grew up and fell in love with you. I was the one who would make all kinds of excuses to be with you, even though she didn’t know why. I’m that girl who thought you were beautiful even when you were drenched, exhausted, and had a pimple on your nose.

I’m that girl, who told you her love by the seaside, waves lapping up on the shore of Sentosa, knowing you could never reciprocate. I was the girl who then watched you walk away from me, after you most politely rejected me because…. I was a girl.

I’m that girl, who said no because she didn’t want to break your heart with the pain of distance. I’m that girl who still loves you from afar.

I’m the girl who cried for you when you told me about what your father was doing to you. I’m that girl who cut herself, in order to feel the pain that her own words caused you.

I’m the girl who worries about you, battling breast cancer. I’m that girl who loves you both like sisters, yet dare not say a word for the fear of being misunderstood. I’m that girl who sees you come online, but act like I haven’t, because too much has happened.

I am the girl now, who watches your every move now, every facial expression and gesture. I am the girl who flushes every single time you speak to me. I am that girl, who gets irrationally jealous when others get near you, boy or girl.

I’m that girl, who lost you when I told you I was bisexual. I’m the one, who loves men and women, but presents only one side to the world for the fear of losing more of you.

I’m that girl, who started this blog to express the other side.

Yeah, I’m that girl. So who are you?

Racial Harmony

2005-09-19T22:12:00.000+08:00
In light of the Sedition incident involving the two bloggers, the racial harmony, and the freedom of speech on the internet in Singapore has come under intense scrutiny and analysis, by everyone from the SPH reporters (case study in irony) to bloggers. The point is clear: the gahmen is watching. [But this is a post for another day]

It seems that all those years of cramming racial harmony and national educational down the throats of those two young boys have been wasted. But we knew that, didn’t we?

It is agreed by practically everyone who has taken a good look at our society: racial harmony is rather superficial in Singapore. It extends to giving half-days off to Indian students on Deepavali Eves, and making sure you pronounce their names correctly. It extends to wishing Malays “Hari Raya Puasa”, without the slightest understanding of what it means.

Today, I took a box of mooncakes to school to share with my classmates. I had three boxes which my father received from various companies as goodwill gifts – no way I’d be able to finish them.

As I sat there, at the canteen table, watching my Chinese classmate cut the mooncakes, it really struck me this was what racial harmony was. As she distributed the quarter cylinders to other Chinese people, their amazed thank yous with a glance at the colour of my skin, were music to my ears.

The funny thing was: none of us, me, and everyone who feasted on the mooncake quarters, were Singaporean.

New Project

2005-09-17T23:41:00.000+08:00
I’ve decided to embark on a new project – it has been a pet dream of mine for some time now.

My last post on beauty is just an extract of the continuing debate within myself, about the nature of beauty, and about accepting myself and my physical appearance. Beauty has become westernised, and commercialised. According to the beauty industry, you can’t be beautiful without fair skin, long lean legs and a tiny waist. You can’t be pretty without applying a ton of cosmetics everyday.

And that’s not to mention sexual racism. Everyday in Singapore I face this: the notion that Indian women can’t be pretty, because we don’t have as tiny waists, as fair skin as Chinese women. The colonial mentality left by our British masters still remain – that white, always, is beautiful.

Therefore, I wish to show the true nature of beauty – without high heels, lipstick or breast implants. I wish to show that fair skin is not the marker of beauty. I wish to show the world that we are all beautiful human beings, no matter what our race.

Therefore, I declare my Flickr.com stream open, dedicated to featuring Indian women, of all ethnicity. I am starting with rural women – their beauty remains the most natural of all, the richness of their culture shining like sunlight through an open window.

I am sourcing photos from the web now, but soon I hope to start shooting some on my own. There will also be a section for celebrities in ethnic shots. I am also trying hard to get portraits/paintings of Indian women – any help is welcome!

My Flickr.com stream

Beauty - The Chase for the Unattainable

2005-09-11T21:59:00.000+08:00
It seems lately I’ve written much on beauty (elsewhere), but only today, that I realise this. Beauty is, in essence, a chase for what you don’t have. Now, that may seem like a simplistic, “duh!” definition, but hear me out, as I attack this age-old debate from a different angle (though I am not sure it is entirely original).

Aesthetic perfection has always been one of the major goals of humankind, no matter how advanced we might get, as a race. It is the essential to attracting mates – a very anthropological response, as appearances serve as a marker of how healthy one is. Male peacocks with large, colourful plumage naturally get more peahens. Why? Because, the larger and more colourful peacocks have higher levels of testosterone. But the higher the level of testosterone, the weaker the immune system. Hence a male with high levels of testosterone is prized, as he is strong enough to survive the side-effects. This is easily analogous to humans. Compare a tall, well-muscled, tanned man to a scrawny, short one, and the choice is clear for the woman, as the former is more likely to give her healthy children.

Now, the chase for beauty has evolved into something much more than its anthropological origins. Daily, women slap on layers of make-up, tweeze their eyebrows and wax their legs, crimp/straighten/curl their hair, all in an effort to look good. And not just so that one can look attractive to one’s potential mates. (if that was the case, what are married women doing?)

Let’s take a look at Jane Doe. Jane has blonde hair, pale skin and a rather flat chest. What does she do? She dyes her hair brown (having heard one too many dumb blonde jokes), suntans religiously and when she has saved up enough money from working night-shifts, goes for breast augmentation. Oh, let’s not forget, she has taken to wearing violet contact lenses, and has permed her arrow-straight hair. Now let’s look at Jill Foe. She has black hair, ebony brown skin and 3D cups. She dyes her hair blonde, slaps on skin-whitening products and goes for breast reduction so she doesn’t look so fat. Not to mention she straightened her curly hair, and wears hazel-coloured contact lenses.

These two women have done everything possible to look different from how they are. My examples may be extreme, but doesn’t it reflect, in some amount, the chase for beauty around the world? Caucasian women tan themselves to the point of skin cancer, while “Fair & Lovely” products fly off the shelves in India. Singaporean Chinese (and maybe mainland Chinese as well) women turn their savings into D cups.

One can blame satellite media for this, as they beam visions of “perfect beauty” all over the world, saturating us with images of how we are “supposed” to look. It is not even a point of being ugly – it is the point of having to look like someone else. Because, according to the titan called cosmetics industry, being you is never enough.

On Why I am a Cynic

2005-09-03T18:40:00.000+08:00
cyn·ic n.
A person who believes all people are motivated by selfishness.

A person whose outlook is scornfully and often habitually negative.

Cynic A member of a sect of ancient Greek philosophers who believed virtue to be the only good and self-control to be the only means of achieving virtue.
Seeing as how I am not an ancient Greek Philosopher, I’d have to identify with number 1 and 2. A skeptic. A person who sees only the price, not the value. Often confused with the brooding pessimist. Hated by romantics and ridiculed by optimists, for our brutally practical outlook. And naturally, shunned by just about everyone who doesn’t want to hear the truth (which comprises fully the non-cynical population of the planet).

Cynicism has its roots amongst the ancient Greeks. (By Jove, did they invent EVERYTHING good on this planet, including toga-tops?) An inborn human trait, it would seem, to criticize what needs to be criticized. We live and die by Murphy’s law.

I borrow this quote: "[A cynic] is an idealist whose rose-colored glasses have been removed, snapped in two and stomped into the ground, immediately improving his vision." (i-cynic.com)

Once, long long time ago in the distant mists of my childhood, I believed. I believed in God. I believed that everything that happens is for the good. I believed that one day, my prince charming would sweep me off my feet, riding in on a white horse. And I believed that the world played fair, rewarding good and punishing evil. I was in a safe idealistic cocoon, within the neat lines of black and white, right and wrong.

Then life happened.

You know, the usual. The discriminatory remarks from the other kids, due to the colour of my skin. Watching people die just because they happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Reading about women being raped and brutalized mercilessly. The world didn’t play fair, honey. It just played.

Even the concept of love wasn’t spared. I admit freely, I am a sucker for love songs as much as the next girl. Yet, the girly, dreamy notion of love stops there. After a couple of crushes, I learnt that outer beauty was indeed more important in our society than any amount of inner beauty. I don’t believe in love at first sight. Lust at first sight, maybe. But never love. And most of all, I don’t believe in true love. Because true love by definition is selfless, all-consuming, focusing only on the object of your affection. Human beings are constitutionally incapable of loving that selflessly, because all love is inherently selfish.

But tell that to an infatuated, moony, teenage girl, and she is likely to hit you.

People dislike cynics because we represent the obstacle to their comfortable illusions. They don’t want to believe that true equality doesn’t exist. Or that the hard-earned they donate to charities hardly goes towards the intended cause. Or that the war which their countries have chosen to wage is doing more harm than good, and not for the reasons their leaders have chosen to tell them. Most of all, they hate us for being so darn right every single time.

Cynics of the world, unite.

Top Ten Things I hate About Blogs

2005-09-02T12:50:00.000+08:00
Presenting to you, the top 10 things I hate about the blogging world.

10. Songposting - for goodness' sake, honey, if you want to songpost, write your own
9. Blogs of attention whores who have little to call attention to
8. Bloggers who TyP lYk Dis
7. Bloggers who think that mangling grammar is cool
6. Bloggers who use their blogs to bitch about everything and everyone else around them
5. Blogfights - the cyberversion of catfights... some human habits die hard....
4. Deep angsty blogs by teens ranting about their dismal life - seriously, lose the angst. You are not the African kid starving to death because her mother died of AIDS.
3. Reveal-all bloggers who love to traumatise their readers by giving every detail from waking up to masturbating at night
2. Celebrity bloggers who are totally puffed up about their own importance

first but not definitely not the best....

1. Xiaxue's blog

whose blog happens to have most of the elements I mentioned above.

Blog

Le Debut... Finally

2005-09-02T11:47:00.000+08:00
I sit in front of my computer one depressing morning, reading all the blogs I've bookmarked. I really should be studying, I think. Exams are around the corner. I look at the exam schedule and put it aside, being the ultimate procastinator I am.

I have never been tempted to start a blog all these years. Why now? I am not sure. Maybe I am getting reckless and suicidal due to the stress. Yeah, that's it. I've always said having a place where the world can see your thoughts is dangerous. Yet I click the big orange buttons page after page to start a blogspot blog. If you discover why, please let me know.